


Serenity becomes you, Chaos

by LionessPearl3



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Firelord Iroh, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, bamf zuko, confused gaang
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-09
Updated: 2019-03-09
Packaged: 2019-07-10 08:33:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 3,618
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15945647
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LionessPearl3/pseuds/LionessPearl3
Summary: Iroh didn't lose his son at Ba Sing Se, and is now firelord. Zuko still lost his mother, but he was older, and it made him question the superiority of the firenation.Then the avatar woke up in the south, and all Zuko's carefully crafted plans... surprisingly didn't change all that much... Just another person to save.(Ps. this is very much a start-of-story/prompt-fic, so it wont have much substance, but anyone is welcome to pick it up, as long as they message me first)





	1. kind of future-prologue

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [The Problem With Zuko](https://archiveofourown.org/works/128154) by [AvocadoLove](https://archiveofourown.org/users/AvocadoLove/pseuds/AvocadoLove). 



> 1\. disclaimer, i dont own avatar......
> 
> aaaand 2. dont you just hate it, when inspiration strikes in the middle of the night, and you have work the next day. So you decide to quickly write it down, and then come back to it the next day..... but then your brain just stalls, and tells you "nope... not another peep out of me, in relation to this story.... this is all you get". And you have to post a tiny, incomplete drabble of a prompt-fic ;(.... Y brain Y
> 
> *gasp* a nr. 3 ;) i got my inspiration back, and is making new chapters :) will probably lose it again, but meh... what happens will happen.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zuko has feelings, and they are sad

He’s there when they’re brought in. Zuko. The useless son of the second prince. Warden of the biggest and worst prison in the fire nation. Where he is far away from the more important family members, so they wont have to look at him, and be reminded that their bloodline isn’t wholly pure.  
The gaang wont know that until later of course. Right now, Zuko just seems like another insurmountable blocade in their quest, and it brings them that much lower, to know that he is here, and will be taking care of them personally.  
\------------------

Zuko makes sure to be there the moment they’re bought in. He has to see if it really is the avatar, and, more importantly, if the rumors are true. The rumors of him being a little boy, even younger than himself.

They are. All of them seem to be younger than he is, even.…

And oh, how it tears at him, so see them so broken. It is clear that their capturers have not been kind to them( _and he knows how that feels, his sister has treated him cruelly in the past too_ ), and he feels even worse, knowing that he will have to continue the charade, even if its just for a little longer.

He has to get them securely behind the walls and bars of his prison, and to his personnel, before he can talk to them properly. Before that, he will have to play the good, disgraced prince, looking for approval in a world where violence is the first and best answer to everything.

\------------------  
It starts like this.

Zuko is a gentle boy, loyal and obedient. He grows up in a household where violence and cruelty is the norm, but he never once speaks out about it. Until he does.  
He is 11 years old, when his uncle and father finally decide to agree on something. Unfortunately, that something is sending his mother into exile, with a target on her back, and only the barest minimum of protection. She dies 2 years later.  
He doesn’t find out until later, that the target on her back is from a hit requested by his father, for the discovery of her( _their_ ) unpure blood, but still, her exile is enough to get him to doubt his father and the firelord.  
But questions of that kind are heavily frowned upon, especially in the royal family, and so he is reprimanded harshly, any time he dares ask them.  
He stops almost immediately of course, but his transgessions are not easily forgotten, and by the time he turns 16, and is recognized as a fully adult member of the family, ready to receive his agni-granted post by the firelord, he is sent to the lowest post a royal-blodded can be allowed to take, without the rest of the family losing face.  
The Prison.  
\-------  
And then comes the rebellion.

It is nothing grand, nothing even truly visible.  
The others of his family think him a weak firebender, and a weak mind, too soft for their preferences.  
He is not. Not truly. He is the leader.  
The leader of prison, true, but also the leader of all the people he can gather under himself, and his banner, who, like him, think that the firelord and his family is too cruel and violent not to be brought down.  
It is hard, of course. Especially at the start, since he is still a member of the aforementioned family, but by the time the avatar awakens in the south, and one of the more prestigeous heirs, his sister Azula, is sent out for him, Zuko has his entire prison staffed with only his supporters, and is slowly but surely reaching out to the other nations.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is just the start, but other plot-points include;  
> Iroh being the actual firelord, because he didn’t lose his son in the seige of ba sing se.  
> Iroh’s son being a dick, like the rest of his family.  
> Zuko being very mature, but also caring.  
> Zuko not actually demanding the Avatars help, like most others, but wanting the avatar trained, and fully prepared, and f*ck the consequences, cause a mentally instable, not very well trained avatar, is most likely more dangerous than another emergence of sozins comet.  
> The Gaang being totally and utterly flummoxed by zuko, because …What ???!?!?!!… The prince…THE PRINCE is the leader of the huge resistance movement….????? And he doesn’t want to kill us?… Or lock us up…? Or even really want us to help him, cause he’s got everything under control, like the royally raised prince he is???????  
> Potential for eventual zuko/sokka, but not necessarily


	2. more plot?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> sokkas thoughts on their escape fom the southern water tribe.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> some more stuff i thought up in the middle of the night... this is becoming a trend :(
> 
> BTW edited a little in the first ch. Nothing major, just some formatting.

When sokka finally has his wits about him again, they are already on the flying bison, and heading for who-knows-where ( _and yes, he knows they are technically heading for the northern water tribe, but how do aang or katara expect to navigate?? Or even find it, without being spotted first, oh this was such a bad idea_ ).

 

The reason he is so addled is not only that he and his sister only just found the flipping AVATAR in an ICEBERG... It is also that they have only just narrowly escaped capture(and most likely torture *shudder*) by one of the most, if not THE most, viscious firebender he has ever met.

 

She ( _and that almost makes it worse, that it was a girl_ ) had arrived in their village late in the afternoon, when all the adults was out hunting.

 

He had known the ship was there before he saw it, because of the black snow ( _it was ash, like the day his mother died, and he would never admit it, but OH how it scared him_ ), and had herded the children into one of the secret hideouts that had been carefully dug out under the ice, just in case this exact thing happened, while all the adult men was away fighting in the war.

 

Therefore, it was only him, his sister and the avatar who were present, when the ship docked. He had wanted to send his sister with the younger children, but she had opposed him vehemently, and threatened to try and waterbend her way out, if he didn’t take her with him. He had agreed, since she could potentially have destroyed the whole cavesystem, if her waterbending wasn’t precise ( _and it never was_ ).

 

When his foolish posturing was done(he had just wanted it to be over quick, _dont let the others come home while the firenation is still here, i need to warn them._ ) and he was on the ground, halfway to unconciousness from the pain of his burns, the firebender had turned to his sister and the avatar and demanded his unconditional surrender, or she would burn the entire village to the ground.

 

The avatar had surrendered. Katara tried to stop him, of course, but he had blown her away with a gust of wind and pointed at the injured Sokka. 

 

The firebenders had taken Aang in chains, and as a final, painful reminder of their superiority, the woman who had burnt Sokka, broke her promise, and burned as much of the village as she could, before they left. ( _All of it, she had burnt all of it, Sokka what are you doing here on this stupid bison, you should be home, helping with the rebuilding, what is wrong with you.)_

 

The adults had arrived to the sight of their village burning, ash in the air, and Katara frantically trying to drag Sokka to the underground caves by herself.  _  
_

 

There had been questions, of course, after they had helped sokka as much as possible, and coralled the small children, but katara had answered most of them, since she had been with the avatar the most, and sokka was still half asleep, half drugged. In the end, it was decided that they would wait for a few days, to help sokka recover, and then they would set out to try and rescue the avatar.

They had a vague plan to have the 2 adult women who could be spared ( _who didn't have children to look after, and wasn't as old as grandma,and were there really only two?_ ) sneak aboard the ship, while Sokka and Katara harassed hem with the very angry flying bison, and find and free the avatar from there.

Thankfully, thay didn't have to rely on that. By an incredible stroke of luck, the firenation ship had strayed into a series of small rapids, that ended in a huge whirlpool. In their effort to avoid the whirlpool, the ship had crashed into a small iceberg, and most of the firebenders were hard at work trying to free the ship, when Sokka, Katara and the small boat holding Miko and Kana reached them.

A full-on assault by an angry Appa took up the rest of the firebenders attention, and Miko, Kana, Sokka and Katara could easily sneak aboard with noone the wiser. Even better, when they reached the deck, Aang was already there, desperately trying to reach Appa. the small watertribe team quickly grabbed him, and hightailed it back to their boat. When they were a sufficient distance away, Katara blew the bison whistle, and Appa broke off, flying in the opposite direction of where they had sailed.

 

Which led to now. After they had all returned home to the watertribe village, and aang had had a earful reunion with Appa, the elders had convened, and decided that Sokka and Katara could be granted the right to accompany the avatar to the nothern watertribe, so they could beg help and support from them, and so that katara could learn healing.

 

It is only now ( _on the flying bison, and no matter how often he thinks that, it keeps being weird_ ) that sokka feels he really has the time to decompress, and process the things that have happened. His burns still hurt, and grandma said they will likely scar, but he still have full use of his arms, so thats okay. He is more worried about aang, who has been still and silent since his reunion with Appa. He had spoken to tell the elders and the rest of the village how sorry he was for the burning of the village, but not much else. Luckily, sokka is here, and he is perfectly willing to set Katara on him, and watch the awkward flailing from the sidelines. 

They will be ok, with a little time.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this was not what i intended to write... at all... help
> 
> in case it wasn't clear (and i dont think it was, im horrible at writing) all the villagers are fine, and they are temporarily living in the hideout-caves, while they hunt for enought skin, and gather enough bones, to rebuild the actual village.
> 
> what i actually intended ti write was some more tings about Zuko, and maybe something form his mothers POV, while she was still alive, but nooooo, this decided it had to be written instead. :) hope u enjoy anyway.


	3. This was the spark

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zukos mother, and her experiences

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> have some more, im in an inspirational mood

When she was young, Maki and her family had lived on the outskirts of proper firenation territory. She had had a normal childhood, though always with the knowledge that her fathers side of the family was not to be talked about to non family members ( _or anyone, really_ ).

Why that was so, she hadn’t known, only that her parent would be _very_ displeased every time anyone even mentioned her great grandmother.

She remembers the moment her childhood had begun to crack though. She had come home one day, to find most of the neighborhood outside her family’s house, and her parents standing on the porch, white-faced and scared.

It had been a blur at the time, and still is, but the next thing she remembers, her family is on the road, travelling towards the capital, and her mom is telling her that her name is not Maki anymore, but Ursa, and that she must call everyone by their new names _always_. She is only 6 and doesn’t understand, but she will do as her mother tells her, as always.

It has been a long time since then, and she is of marrying age now. She and her family lives in the capital now, but they are only just scraping by, having never regained the wealth that they lost, fleeing their home. That is why she has to marry as soon as possible, and preferably to a noble, to provide wealth to her family.

This will be difficult, she knows, coming from a poor family as she does, and it is only made more difficult by her familys secret.

She knows more then she did when she was a child now. She knows that her father's grandmother on his mothers side was an airbender, and that to be able live anywhere in the firenation peacefully, let alone marry anyone of noble blood, she and her family must cover it up, lest they be banished from the firenation.

She is both parts elated and scared out of her mind when the Second Prince takes notice of her. On one hand, this wil provide her family with an immense amount of wealt, but on the other, if her family’s secret comes out now, the consequences will be all the more severe, for having inadvertently humiliated the royal family.

She acepts his advances though. After all, there is no way to tell the Royal Family, 'No'.

\----------

Then Firelord Azulons dies, and a recall is issued, to get prince Iroh back from the frontlines, so he can be named the new firelord.

Ursa has feared for this day since she married Ozai. It is Royal Custom and Tradition, for the fire sages, together with the royal scribes, to review all that the royal family has done, since the start of the previous firelords reign.

Her family had bribed the former scribe to fake a background for her fathers side of the family, but that scribe is dead now, and while that is good ( _he cannot blackmail them that way_ ) it is also immensely bad, because he cannot prevent the other scribes from looking too closely at the forged papers.

They figure it out. Of course they do. It was always only a matter of time, and now she has to leave her beloved son and daughter behind in that place, as the new firelord suggests ( _It is an order, it can be nothing else_ ) to her that she ‘take a long vacation’ in a location of his choosing.

She ends up being taken to a smaller estate on the fringes of the colonies. She doesn’t want to stay there, but guards have been posted, allegedly for her protection, though she doubts it.

\-------

She has been there for a couple of months, when her family manages to get news to her. They are banished also, to what little remains of the earth kingdom, but they have contacts still in the firenation, and through them, has gotten a letter to her, containing what little rumors they have heard, most concerning being the rumor that somebody has placed a hit on her.

She has no doubt that it is Ozai. He is a prideful man, and with his chance at the throne stolen, he will not be able to tolerate the further humiliation her continued existence will cause him.

\-----------------

She dies in the end.

But she dies with her final thoughts on the letter she has written, safe in the hands of her family’s fledgling system of contacts, and to be delivered to her son, as soon as is possible, while still being safe for the messenger.

She dies with the knowledge that her death will spark a revolution in her son, and goes to death with a smile on er face.

\------------

Months later, a still devastated Zuko finds a letter on his bed, with his mothers handwriting on it.

And he questions.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and i still have more plot notes.... why brain why
> 
> and also, yes... i realise plotholes (*cough* timeline *cough*) is a thing ok.... i just cant be bothered to really research all of that stuff.....


	4. The timeline so far

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> what the title says. I have the whole timeline, but i will update this one, when i have posted more actual plot-chapters.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> some of it is taken from this website;  
> https://avatar.fandom.com/wiki/History_of_the_World_of_Avatar#War_years_.280_.E2.80.94_100_AG.29  
> although ive fudged the timeline a little, to make it work with my headcanon.
> 
> also, most of the inspiration for maki/ursa's timeline after the banishment came from "Bookwyrm", so credit to them :)

Serenity becomes you, Chaos – timeline;

0 AG

Avatar Aang is confirmed as Avatar at the age of fourteen, two years earlier than normal, because the monks were fearful of a possible war. The monks decided to send Aang to the Eastern Air Temple to continue his training. Distraught and confused by his destiny, he flees from the Southern Air Temple with his flying bison, Appa. Upon getting caught in a storm and being pulled underwater, Aang enters the Avatar State and encases himself in ice near the South Pole.

50 AG

Airbenders begin to be born to people with air nomad ancestry all over the central continent(earth kingdom and fire nation), as the world tries to balance itself.

61 AG

Maki is born

67 AG

Maki and her family flees their home, and she becomes known as Ursa

71 AG

The Royal family of the firenation becomes aware of the new airbenders and starts to hunt them down.

The airbenders who are not caught go into hiding.

77 AG

Ursa marries Ozai

80 AG

Prince Zuko is born to Prince Ozai and Princess Ursa.

81 AG

Princess Yue is born to Chief Arnook of the Northern Water Tribe and his wife. A sickly infant, Yue is healed by the Moon Spirit, Tui, by having some of its life spirit infused within her.

Sokka is born to Chief Hakoda and Kya of the Southern Water Tribe.

82 AG

Princess Azula is born to Prince Ozai and Princess Ursa.

Katara is born to Chief Hakoda and Kya of the Southern Water Tribe.

85 AG

Toph Beifong is born to Lao Beifong and Poppy Beifong of Gaoling.

90 AG

Iroh begins his legendary Siege of Ba Sing Se.

The Southern Raiders attack the Southern Water Tribe in an attempt to kill the last Southern waterbender. Chief Hakoda's wife Kya sacrifices herself to save the eight-year-old Katara, the true last waterbender of the Southern Water Tribe.

91 AG

Firelord Azulon dies suddenly

Iroh is called back from the war, to take his place as the new firelord.

A review of everything is carried out

Ursa and her family is banished, ursa to an unoccupied mansion on the fringes of the firenation, her family to what remains of the earth kingdom.

Ursas family begins to establish a fledling network of contacts in the fire nation, to contact their daughter.

93 AG

Ursa dies

Zuko(13 yo) finds a letter from her on his bed

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i have a headcanon about how the ATLA world tries to balance itself. It goes like this.  
> Wind feeds Fire, and Water feeds Earth.  
> Water weakens Fire and Wind weakens Earth.  
> Water and wind are neutral, and so is fire and earth.  
> So..  
> When the airbenders were knocked out of the equation, there became more earthbenders, and more waterbenders to support the system. But then over half the waterbenders were killed, and it weakened the earthbenders. That left the world with a lot of firebenders, no airbenders, and a weakened popuation of other benders. Following that, with the high number of firebenders, eventually the number of airbenders would have to follow. This is why they start to appear/be born into the world again, so much sooner in my story, than in canon.


	5. The letter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ursa's letter to zuko

He fumbles with the paper at first, unable to belive that it is actually real, a treasure sent from the past, containing his mother's last words to him.

Finally, after he has sat down, and calmed his shaky fingers, he opens it. He pulls two letters out, one with his mothers wellknown handwriting, and one with a strangely familiar handwriting.

He reads his mother's first.

_ To Zuko _

_ My beloved child. I write to you now, because I have gotten hold of rumors of a hit being placed on me, and I fear that I will not be long for this world. _

_ I hear the guards talk of their duty to the crown, and the servants whisper of unlocked doors and open windows, when they should have been locked and closed. _

_ Take a deep breath, my son, and sit down. I have something to tell you. _

 

He is already sitting on the edge of his bed but, on her urging, braces his back against the headbord, and tries to prepare himself.

 

_ You know I was banished. You do not know why. _

_ You remember Baba? Grandfathers mother? Well, it has long been a secret in my family, that your Baba’s mother was an air nomad, and that we therefore have impure blood. _

 

He gasps out loud, and immediatly slaps a hand over his mouth, suddenly afraid that someone will come investigate.

 

_ I know your father married me partially for my mother’s unbroken connection to avatar Roku, and it has made him furious to learn that I have ‘tainted’ his supposedly pure bloodline.  _

_ I am sorry son, but I believe Ozai was the one to place the hit on me. Firelord Iroh likely encouraged it, to be able to wash his hands of me, without implicating the royal family. _

_ Listen Zuko. You must not show anger towards them. Do not question them, especially not in public. Never tell them no. Try not to entertain disloyal thoughts even.  _

_ These are things I learned in my marriage to your father, and you would do well to learn them also. _

_ I know it saddens you to read this, but my marriage was never a peaceful, loving one. The only bright spots were you and your sister, and I see now that even Azula has been corrupted by Ozai. _

_ My only wish is for you to be safe and happy. I fear that can never be so, as long as Ozai, Firelord Iroh and Azula remains in the ruling family. I am sorry. _

_ I can but tell you how to contact my family, so that you may have some closure, and hopefully someone to talk to. Enclosed are instructions I got from my family on how to reach our contact in the palace. Please, memorize them and burn the paper. _

_ Be safe, my son. _

_ And stay gentle. _

__

_ Love, Your Mother, Ursa _

_  
_

He is crying quietly by the time he places the letter carefully down on his bed, and picks the other one up.

 

__

_ Ursa, my dearest daughter. I have sent you this letter, to put with the one you are sending to your son. _

_ It explains how to reach our contact in the palace, if he ever needs to contact us. _

_ Firstly, he must make sure to disguise himself. He will have to leave the palace, and one of the royal family cannot simply leave without an escort. _

_ On the Corner of Kelms alley and Hiros Way, near the marketplace, is a wall with a peculiar set of murals on it. It is used to send prayers to Agni, you know the one I speak of. _

_ He must go there and place his letter to us among the pile, addressed ‘For the belssed Lord Agni’, signed Blue Spirit. Remember the spelling, it is important. _

_ It will look a simple spelling mistake and an anonymus sender, but our contact will recognize it, and get it to us. _

_ Be sure to tell your son that we love him also, and to remember to disguise himself differently **every time** he goes there. _

__

_ Love, Your Father, Zenlon _

 

Zuko feels overwhelmed. There is so much sorrow in him, but also a whole new wellspring of anger and hate. He knows his mother told him not to question or lay blame, but he is so  **angry**. But he is also scared. What if his father finds out about the letter, and  _takes it from him!._ That cannot be allowed to happen. Its the only thing he has left of his mother.

He has only just found a hiding place for his mother letter, and burnt the other one, when all of it hits him at once, and he begins to cry in earnest yet again. He collapses on his bed, and cries himself to sleep. He vaguely hopes tomorrow will help clear his mind.

**Author's Note:**

> as for any comments... I have recieved some fabulous ones, with good plot details, and i thought i should mention here that i feel like i would mostly like to use all of it, and i you dont want that, to please write it in your comment :) credit will probably be given in individual chapter notes ;)


End file.
